By Kristen Strezo
Member, the Somerville Commission for Women

Preventing dating abuse is important to the Somerville Commission for Women (SCW). We connect with the community to raise awareness. Every October we hold our annual Domestic Violence Vigil.

Likewise, we believe that teenagers are an important focus for getting out the word out against abuse. Last year, we funded the Peacekeepers, a youth leaders club that raises awareness about dating and domestic abuse to prevent and transform conflict (I’m looking forward to talking about the Peacekeepers, Somerville’s own anti-violence task force, in a future article).

And, it’s important to consider the messages we send about love, what we choose to talk about—or, fail to mention—and how it affects the younger generations. Parents and guardians want to talk about dating, but may inadvertently graze the deeper conversation.

Take a 2009 survey conducted by Teenage Research Unlimited for the Family Violence Prevention Fund and Liz Claiborne Inc., which found that while three of four parents report talking to their kids about healthy relationships, 74 percent of sons and 66 percent of daughters report no conversation about dating abuse.

Maybe we’re too optimistic. That same study found that four out of five parents thought that they would be able to tell if their child was in an abusive relationship. But when asked to provide symptoms of dating violence, 58 percent of parents could not identify all of the symptoms of abuse.

Information is available for those ready to initiate a dialogue about dating violence. Parents and guardians can to help spread the message about dating abuse, or maybe guide kids to resources, should they ever doubt. For instance, Loveisrespect.org invites teens to text ‘loveis’ to 22522 and a peer advocate will offer to answer questions or comments. The campaign is also available for online chat and has a 24-hour hotline (866-331-9474).

Here in Somerville, we have RESPOND, New England’s oldest domestic violence prevention organization. RESPOND works closely with the community to get the word out, and like Loveisrespect, the RESPOND crisis hotline is accessible 24 hours a day at 617-623-5900.

I understand that the topic of dating violence can be difficult to talk about with loved ones. We all want to believe that our kids are savvy enough to know the difference between abusive relationships or when to draw the line against name-calling. But, until negative dating statistics are a thing of the past, we must have the conversations and we must raise awareness.

Our annual Candlelight Vigil to commemorate Domestic Violence Awareness Month, will be on Wednesday, October 5th from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. at Statue Park in Davis Square.  We hope you will join us.

Somerville Commission for Women member Kristen Strezo. — Photo by Maja de Silva

Kristen Strezo is a Commissioner on the City of Somerville’s Commission for Women; however, the views and opinions expressed in this article are entirely her own and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the City of Somerville.

The Somerville Commission for Women’s (SCW) purpose is “to act as a centralizing force in the City of Somerville to ensure the equal status of women in educational, economic, political, health, legal, and social spheres including the provision of information, referrals and guidance.” SCW monthly meetings are held the third Tuesday, 7:00 p.m., at the Public Safety Building (220 Washington St., Union Square) and are wheelchair accessible. Contact the SCW at choseman@somervillema.gov or call 617-625-6600 ext. 2406.