On The Silly Side by Jimmy Del Ponte

(The opinions and views expressed in the commentaries of The Somerville News belong solely to the authors of those commentaries and do not reflect the views or opinions of The Somerville News, its staff or publishers.)

When we first arrived at ArtBeat on Saturday, my son Joey said, ‚Where is the entertainment?‚ To which, I replied, ‚Just look around, it’s everywhere.‚ People watching was in full swing.

Somerville attracts a very diverse and interesting mix of citizens and visitors. Saturday looked like they could have been filming a movie called ‚Hippies and Yuppies and Villens, Oh My!‚ We have it all in Somerville, and the best of the best were out for ArtBeat.. Old, young, pierced, un-pierced, longhaired, shorthaired, green haired, inked and ink-less. Joey said it looked like Woodstock had come to Davis Square.

ArtBeat is an unbelievably successful and fun undertaking – every year it gets better and better. We spent four fun packed hours among the artistic throng.

I was filming some footage for Somerville Cable, which was interesting. I wonder how much of my goofy interviews they will actually use! We came upon the ‚Save the panda bear booth.‚ They wanted $20.00 for a t-shirt with a picture of a panda bear on it. I told the guy I could buy a real panda bear for $20.00 – then I apologized for being a wise guy – I can’t help it. To my credit, I didn’t know pandas were endangered. I’m still working on saving the whales, but I’m running out of places to keep them.

I did pick up a couple of cool t-shirts and they were in a reasonable price range. You could buy anything and everything from the numerous vendors. Necklaces, earrings, books, pottery and even henna tattoos.

One thing you could not buy was a cool breeze – every year ArtBeat seems to fall on the hottest and most humid day of the year. I found a mini-wind tunnel near the Holland Street T station, but a more strategic plan was needed. My son and I went into the Boston Sports Club to cool down and decided to use the bathroom – I flashed my membership card and in we went.

Mike’s Pizza was virtually empty most of the day on Saturday, so we went in for a slice and a place to sit with air conditioning – both were scarce that day, trust me. There were ‚Äúout of order‚Äù signs on the restroom doors in Mike’s, but since we were paying customers, we used them. Well, my son used it. All my liquids sweated out of my pores as fast as I could replenish them. Good thing I had a bandana with me.

Some lady was selling flutes, but I already have two. A woman performer had silver make up on and was dressed in a turn of the century costume – she was posing as a statue. She was hot, plus she was sweating. She took numerous water and slush breaks.

I remember bringing my kids to ArtBeat when they were babies – that was always a handful – I really had to keep an eye on them every second. This year, I set my kid loose and we kept in touch with our cell phones – that was a pleasure. Somerville sure has a lot of artsy people, which is a good sign that culture is prospering.

There was a booth manned by members of a local church – they were inviting people to their Sunday service. It gave me an idea to start my own church‚since I watch The Three Stooges every Sunday, maybe I’ll call my church ‚Saint Curley’s‚ (no offense to all the churches out there). I could take up a collection to help pay my mortgage.

At ArtBeat, if you needed nourishment there were tons of food booths. Indian, barbecue, soy and even those fancy cupcakes – and let me tell you, one of those hi-tech, hi-breed cupcakes would give you enough of a rush to propel you through the rest of the day.

There was a lot of earth-friendly “green” activities manned by those noble folks who are trying to save the earth Рwe should all be helping with that cause, for sure. I have been recycling the same jokes and clothes for years.

I sampled a certain health bar that was being offered free by some young sample hawkers. I tried it and let’s just say the cellophane wrapper from a Twinkie had more flavor. I made a joke about the product – I said it was only missing two things: moisture and flavor. They didn’t like that comment, so one of them made a remark about the highlights in my hair – I told them to send their complaints to L’Oreal.
I almost tried some Indian food, but when I found out it had goat in it, I chickened out. I like my goats in the zoo or on a farm, not in my food. There were thousands of people in the square enjoying the sweltering sights, sounds and sundries.

The musical group Rota Temporis, who Joe Curtatone invited personally from Italy, was one of the highlights of the festivities. The sound systems were the best ever and the entertainment was top shelf.

There were toddlers on unicycles and kids on stilts – everyone was eating, drinking, sweating and smiling. The group from Teen Empowerment and SOS (Save Our Somerville) got jiggy with some original rap – they inspired the audience. In fact, I think the kids who were there would say they were very fly. They really put their hearts into what they believe in.

Add another feather in the Mayor and his staff’s cultural and artistic caps. And speaking of feathers, I am starting a grass roots organization of my own‚it’s called: Protect Our Oppressed Pigeons – if you want to donate, simply write the acronym on the check.

Please e-mail your comments to Jimmy at: jimmydel@rcn.com