It's
that time of year again. Reading and writing and 'arithmetic. This time
of year used to make me sick. When I heard those commercials like
"before you go back to school, go to Zayres," my stomach cringed. It
also seemed that we always discovered something really cool right at
the end of the summer that was now cut short by school. One year it was
extending the forks on our bikes, another year it was hanging out with
a new group of girls on the next street. Sometimes it was playing
football or Frisbee, but school always goofed it up. I spoke to a few
of my friends who, like me, still get a nervous ache in their stomach
whenever the beginning of the school year starts.

Both my kids
are actually anxious to get back to school. Man have times changed. I
tried every trick in the book to get out of school, and I mean
everything. We were playing hooky at my friend Teddy's house when I was
a sophomore at Somerville High. My pal Danny called in to the office
disguising his voice, and saying he was Mr. Del Ponte. Whoever answered
the phone at the High school said, "My, Mr. DelPonte, you certainly
have a young voice!" I called back a second later and said, "James Del
Ponte will be right in." When I was still at St. Clements, I faked a
stomach ache to get out of school. There was actually nothing wrong
with my stomach at all. I lied about the pain. My parents took me up
Somerville High School where they removed my appendix. That will teach
me to fake an illness, right? Wrong. I invented a mysterious pain in my
leg to try to ditch a few classes. My hypochondriac mother dragged me
back to the same Doctor who found a mysterious "baker's cyst" in the
back of my leg and, voila, another operation. There was no leg pain
whatsoever, but "Dr. Invento," sold my parents two unnecessary
surgeries. Sure there is a chance that there really WAS something wrong
with my leg and appendix, but because of the reputation of this
nameless Doctor, I seriously doubt it. There is a still a small stitch
visible on the back of my leg that was "operated" on. The scar left by
Dr. Create-an-ailment was so bad, that I actually called Jim Sokolove.
They told me that too many years had gone by. It's a good thing I
didn't fake a headache. I would have ended up with a lobotomy. I
finally learned my lesson about creating imaginary illnesses in order
to stay out of school. Bottom line was, I really hated going to school.
I wanted to stay home and watch re-runs of Gomer Pyle and Yogi Bear
cartoons. Anything but school. But it was different then – there were
only a handful of nice teachers. I didn't say 'good' teachers mind you,
I said nice. Maybe it was difficult to be nice to a kid wearing bell
bottoms dungarees and sporting a David Cassidy haircut. Perhaps some
teachers didn't approve of our being in an organization called the
Committee of Concerned Students and publishing a newspaper called The
Inside Agitator. Teachers back then used threatening tactics to try to
get us to conform. It was like prison. It made us appreciate the really
good teachers all the more. Dick Gordinier, Julio Perno, Tony Fedele,
Mrs. Carafotes, Mr. De Angelis and Mr. Da Prato, to name a few. I could
rattle off a few of the meanies too, but you know who they were. One
former building master was partly responsible for my resigning as the
high school drama teacher. After making my four years of high school
miserable, this person was now going to be my "superior." No thanks. I
probably would have been close to retiring at this point in time.
Anyway, I didn't apply for the job, they came and asked me. It's now
all water under the Ball Square Bridge.

I still have
nightmares that I am in school, facing an exam, with no pencil, and in
my pajamas. I am glad my kids like school. For me it was a bad memory
except for the talent shows and drama performances. They tried to make
me repeat one class with the same blow-hard macho, head tripping idiot
that flunked me the first time. That's when I dropped the college
course. HA HA!! I still went to college anyway! And I still carry a
grudge against that jerk teacher. I never needed his jive class at all.
I have been counting on my fingers for years and it has worked out just
fine! I would like to give my thanks and gratitude for all the great
teachers I had over the years. I would also like to express my
thankfulness for all the awesome teachers my kids have. A lot of my
friends and former classmates are now teachers!

After working
very closely with the Somerville School Department over the past year,
I am happy to report that we are very lucky to have the best schools
possible. Times have changed for the best and any student in the
Somerville Public Schools can look forward to the best education they
can possibly get.