Elizabeth McCarthy is a freshman at Endicott College pursuing an undergraduate degree in education. In her free time, she enjoys dancing, spending time with friends, consuming any kind of dessert, and of course, writing. While not at school, she lives with her family on the North Shore.

Elizabeth McCarthy

Read Before Use

There should be a warning
Neatly printed on the side of the plastic canister
Or robotically announced on the QVC infomercial
Caution: the side effects of a grudge.

1. Remembrance

You’ll think about it all the time 
The picture of revenge staring back at you in the mirror
Greed mixed with treason and pride
Anecdotal depression when you think of why you feel so crazed.

2. One-sided Fixation

They won’t think of you as much as you’ll think of them
An obscure regret that helped them be better
Meet someone new
They consume your mind like a bad dream while you quietly deteriorate from theirs. 

3. Discarded Redemption

It takes effort to hold on to the hatred
Their redeeming qualities poking through a memory 
Or a memento or gift 
You work hard to abominate the things you once loved. 

4. Anxiety 5. Fear 6. Bitterness 

7. Communication Flaws

Nancy Drewing every word you hear for true intentions 

8. Physical Illness 

Your body’s immune system failing as the poisonous dislike moves through your blood

9.  Resentment 

You’d be so pure, so clean if only the villain had stayed away.

10.  The inability to move on

Countless perfectly good matches pass you by 
They hold the door for other people and buy red roses on Valentine’s day 
Intimacy that should have been given to you. 

But forgiveness is no sister to heartbreak
Not when you’re still in the thick of it 
The absence of absolution
The drug of a grudge. 

— Elizabeth McCarthy